


Not Another Day

by goldencal



Category: Women's Soccer RPF
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-28
Updated: 2014-10-28
Packaged: 2018-02-22 22:55:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,553
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2524748
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goldencal/pseuds/goldencal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>"did I make a mistake giving you my heart?"</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not Another Day

**Author's Note:**

> This is a one shot inspired by two songs by Yuna called "Stay" and "Decorate".  
> check out Yuna if you don't know her, she's an awesome artist. 
> 
> It is what it is as always...

Another morning, another restless slumber. Her nomadic ways didn't mind the couch she had been staying on for the past week or so, but If she could wake up anywhere else in the world, it would be in a bed with the girl who held her heart. 

Brooklyn had been Tobin's getaway from the one girl who had made her feel so alive and dead at the same time. Tobin had been fed up with Alex's fickle mind that this time around, she left her back at their apartment in LA. 

_"Why are we still even doing this? You claim that you've changed but all I see is the same thing! You say that you've finally committed to this relationship but here you are pulling the same shit again Alex!"_

_"Tobin what you saw was nothing! Trust me please. He came by to get the rest of his stuff and we talked."_

_"Alex, you lied. You said that you dropped off his stuff weekends ago. So why was he really here?" The silence was building and Tobin's anger was rising as well._

_"I come back from Paris expecting you to be ready to actually to be with me but you're still deciding between me and him._

_"I am! Tobin this time I am." Alex steps closer to her and places her hands on Tobin's waist._

_Tobin shaking her head not believing her words and pulls Alex's hands away from her, "I can't keep being your back whenever you and him are over. I'm not something for your convenience, I'm tired of the games. I can't do this anymore Alex, there's nothing left to fight for with you."_

_"I need you please." The plea in her voice, the tears from her eyes, her shaky hands, this would have made Tobin stay if this was months ago, but not anymore._

_"I'm leaving Alex, I should be back for my things by the end of the week." Grabbing her two duffle bags and walks out of the door, not turning back._

The sun is finally rising and Tobin breaks from the replay in her head and makes her way into the kitchen. She turns on the coffee maker and fires up the stove to make some eggs and bacon for her and Kelley.

Kelley had been her saving grace throughout the whole ordeal with Alex. She had known about the couple's ups and downs because of Tobin. Also, the fact that Kelley kept her eye out on Alex while Tobin was away in Paris. So to Tobin, she owed a lot to Kelley for being there for her numerous times when things started going downhill because of Alex.

"You know I don't mind you moving into the guest room officially right? Cause that couch is all right in all but not to sleep on almost everyday." This gets a small laugh out of Tobin, who is pouring a cup of coffee for her.

"I know I know but it's just so convenient to fall on right when I get back from training." 

Kelley knew as well as Tobin did why she hasn't moved into the room. It would mean that it was for sure over. Although Tobin did end the relationship, the wounds were still fresh and she did not want to push Tobin into anything yet. All Kelley could do was be there for her and cheer her up when she could.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

The amount of time Tobin had spent working on getting herself back together helped improved her game but also her social life. Tobin wasn't necessarily looking but she enjoyed the company of others when she went out with Kelley and her friends. 

As life was starting to pick up again for Tobin, life found a way to push her back by a blue eyed beauty showing up to her and Kelley's apartment unannounced. 

"Alex? What are you doing here?" Tobin found herself stunned, staring into eyes that she hadn't seen in months. 

"I'm sorry to show up like this but I was hoping we could talk." Alex's voice sounding hesitant and nervous. 

"You've should've called first or something, you can't just show up like this here..." Tobin's firm voice caused Alex to look away from her. Tobin stops herself from getting too worked up about the situation in front of her. She let's out a long sigh and steps aside indicating for Alex to come in.

Alex takes a seat on the couch while Tobin stands across from her trying to figure Alex out. The awkward silence starts to frustrate Tobin because she had run out of patience a long time ago with her once lover. 

Not wanting to stand any longer, Tobin takes a seat on the recliner that still puts a good distance between the two. 

"So, what do you want to talk about Alex?" Her tone isn't harsh but effective enough to make Alex even more nervous.

"He proposed." In an instant those two words that cause an ache in Tobin. She believed herself that these feelings for the girl across her were gone enough to not hurt her anymore but she was wrong. 

Alex looks back down to her fidgety hand and Tobin looks as well to Alex's hands. There she finds her answer to the question she didn't let out. 

"When's the wedding?" Tobin's voice sounding emotionless now. 

"Sometime in January." Alex is still avoiding Tobin's gaze towards her. Silence fills the room once again. 

Something breaks in Tobin causing her to stand up and pace back and forth across the living room. She's gathering her thoughts and words before she can say anything, but it clicks into her that she doesn't care anymore because she's tired of hurting.

"You come here to tell me that you're getting married without any precaution to all of this. Do you know how it's been for the last few months for me? I've spent weeks on that couch crying over you, drinking over you, losing myself over you, and how Kelley took care of me like a sick puppy. Four years of this on and off game with you Alexandra. Do you know what that does to a person? I loved you throughout those four years faithfully, all the while you didn't. If I was never your choice the whole time, why do you keep showing up in my life? I'm not something you expect to have every time you want me. I'm done Alex. You can no longer keep coming back just when I'm starting to be myself again. Everything ends here tonight." All of the aggression and words she held back from saying finally came out. No longer did she feel like a prisoner to the words unsaid and emotions she felt towards Alex. 

Alex began to cry from the words she never knew Tobin held inside of her. She had no one to blame but herself. She broke the girl that loved her. The girl she loves no longer wants her. 

"I'm sorry Tobin, I didn't know what I was thinking all those times before. I still don't, I just thought I could come here and somehow everything would just feel okay again. I just needed things to feel okay again." Through the tears and sniffles Alex let out, she tries to gain her composure to explain herself to Tobin. Tobin who is still furiously standing across from Alex. 

"Tobin, you made me feel safe and loved like no other, but somehow I got scared along the way and that you were too good to be mine. When you'd leave for Paris every summer, I didn't feel that safety anymore, so I ran to someone else but it was never enough like you. I never wanted to hurt you the way I did. I'm sorry that I did this to us." Alex buries her face into her hands and cries more now that she knows everything said is too real for her. The emotions and words she had run from finally caught up to her in this moment. 

Tobin takes a seat back on the recliner and runs her hands through her hair in frustration. Taking the moment to muster up anything end this situation. 

"Alex" Tobin calls out her name soft and calmly than ever before tonight.  
"Everything ends for us tonight, there's nothing left for us anymore. I could say that you're forgiven right now but I'd be lying to you. I don't want anymore lies between us. Somewhere down the road, we'll be okay. We need the time and space." 

Tobin gets up from the chair and kneels in front of Alex and takes her hands into her own. Their eyes finally meet tonight. 

"You're getting married that should bring you the happiness and safety you're looking for. Be with him. Love him honestly and patiently. Everyone needs a love like that." 

Alex pulls Tobin into an embrace because she's knows that this it. The last time she will ever get to hold Tobin like this in her arms. She buries her head into Tobin's neck to catch the scent of her for the last time. 

Tobin allows the hug to happen because for her this is the ending to her suffering. The last time to hold the girl who she loved honestly and patiently.

**Author's Note:**

> One shot is one shot, sorry y'all.


End file.
